And when a first date in question, the first time to know a little more depth to the other person (if we have already known for some time before deciding to leave) or watch it for the first time (for the marshy area of blind dates) all these fears can only be magnified to levels not measurable.
In favor of the first appointments and nervous disorders that cause, I must say that at least do not discriminate and do the same havoc in men than in women, regardless of age or religion (even if in some idea of society that men may fear more to the first date, they feel they have to prove more than women).
Of course, self-esteem plays a role, and there are people that will be much better stops the days before the event than others to finish in bed, but in general we can say that all suffer even a little nervous.
The same, of course, we're exaggerating. A first date is not so terrible, and in no way is something that should be feared as if the world ends in question. Indeed, quite the opposite, a first date is the opportunity to meet someone with more depth, to spend a wonderful time of fun and much, why not, maybe start a serious relationship.
But beyond the hype we've done almost humorous purposes, there are nerves, that can not be denied. And the best way to overcome the nerves is to prepare, making sure that nothing can go wrong.
Now suppose we have made an appointment with someone who wants to know. Chances are we do not want to leave anything to chance, we want to leave the best impression on your partner, so we can repeat it. To avoid the nerves, then, we must take into account multiple factors in the preparation, to ensure that you can not fail to walk for a magical night.
Here they are, then, that advice (very simple and does not require great expense or effort or money or planning) that can ensure an excellent time and a second appointment even better.
Being Yourself
This is the most basic advice, we have heard ad nauseam in self-help seminars, on television and in the mouths of all our favorite rock stars. But it also seems to be the most ignored advice for most people who kill for create a fascinating picture and keep it throughout the evening. Unfortunately, we tell all those people that does not work.
People who can not act on his own personality on a first date is half the battle lost. Acting as one normally acts to demonstrate that one has respect, he is comfortable with himself otherwise is to assume that one is not interesting enough, handsome, sexy, funny or clever. And the person you're dating is going to perceive and react based on this.
Besides, one thing is essential: you can not live a lie. Let us to act in a totally different, imitating every move and utterance of James Bond, and with this we could succeed in starting a relationship with another person, how long could we maintain? How long it would take to show as we really are?
And what happens when we fall the mask? Besides, what pleasure we would have a relationship with someone who thinks we're totally different people than they really are? Absolutely not. Whether we admit or not, we all want to find someone who loves us for who we are. Small grants are made on the couple, but change the personality is too big.
In conclusion, just as we introduce is the only logical choice. The other person may be interested or not by us may like what you see and hear it or not, but you can not act a character, because that's not the way to achieve a little more serious relationship.
As we said sometime in the previous section, to be a good appointment for someone else, it is vital that we respect ourselves, that we love. A person who has high self-esteem, which is respected and you will, is a much more attractive for those who get away with it.
If, on the other side, we feel bad about ourselves, we respect and we hate how we look or how we act, the other person will perceive no doubt and feelings surely will go in that direction. Nobody will want to if we want ourselves.
The self-love attracts more love. This is true and you cant avoid it. The safe provides security and personality attracts people, which then leads to more security. Is a circle.
Display
We use the mind's eye! What is in the mind's eye? We refer to the power of visualization, imagine what will happen during the appointment and how we will act.
We must start doing it for days before the event takes place during the week. We just imagine how it will be all that we do, how we going to sit, talk and behave, with much confidence, with what security with that calm smile without showing nervousness at any time.
Of course, you imagine how we act calmly and correctly. It's not about to let your imagination freely, because if we do it will most likely begin to imagine, disaster after disaster, the thousand and one ways in which our meeting we can stop crying in the car and our partners at home calling an ex-boyfriend.
The view that we do should focus on seeing ourselves during the meeting, sitting quietly at the table, asking for food, talking, always sure of ourselves, well presented and attractive. We must make a display as complete as possible.
We really feel we are in place and we are experiencing the long-awaited moment! Imagine how we laugh at a joke, as we make a witty comment, and smile radiating peace and security.
This we must practice as much as possible, all the time, at work, on the street, our home, wherever and whenever. We do it until we feel is real and that is exactly how it will happen.
The List
All, absolutely all of us have positive qualities. A lot. We should be aware of this but in general, are much more aware of those qualities that we play against, our negative points. This is fine, but we must never let the know our weaknesses prevent us from knowing in what ways we stand and what our best.
When we're on a date, is even more important to be aware of these strong points. Then, a few days before the big moment we must prepare a list on a piece of paper, where we write all our qualities, everything that makes us special.
This can include both points of our personality as things in our lives. Are we smart? Do we make people laugh? Do we have an interesting job? Do we excel in any artistic area in particular? Is our hair looks perfect? All this must go to our list of virtues.
Once we have the army list, we take the trouble to read it a few times each day. We not only know these virtues, but to be fully embedded in them, know them as our own and never to doubt that we possess. It is the best way to show them openly when we are in the first encounter with your partner.
On the other hand, knowing what is good in us will help us feel much more confident during the appointment, and, as stated in the above, it shows and people react on the basis of this. Furthermore, these good points capped a deficiency that we feel we have and we are especially aware.
The Excessive Advertising Is Bad
Some people make the mistake of assuming that the way to impress the other person is telling all his achievements and talking about all their good points. This is a serious mistake.
As we said, we must be aware of the qualities we have, but we should not throw them in the face to our partner at every opportunity. Moreover, we should not even once. We are not making a propaganda ourselves as a product, but we are sharing a meal (or what we have decided to do) with a person you find interesting and attractive.
Therefore, we do not need advertising to make us how good we are as people, how we are loved by all our fellow workers or how we are one of the funniest people in the world. The other person must realize these qualities for themselves. We simply get in game and your partner surely noticed.
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